If you want to kill yourself, kill what you don’t like. I had an old self that I killed. You can kill yourself too, but that doesn’t mean you got to stop living.
You playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightening about shrinking so that others won’t feel uncomfortable around you. As you let your own light shine, you indirectly give others permission to do the same.
I saw that my life was a vast glowing empty page and I could do anything I wanted.